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Woke Calvinism: William Perkins in Brooklyn






In the wake of the success of Grayson Perry’s Big American Road Trip, we recently sat down in Williamsburg with the still little known Elizabethan divine (no, of course not that one) at the start of his speaking tour of the Atlantic Coast which had been stimulated by seeing a potential new congregation. 

Perkins had just arrived on The Gadfly after a journey of several months. The original plan had been to launch a new ship (prospectively called The Mayflower) but the whole enterprise had become bogged down in disputes about sourcing the timber and the precise kind of knots to use on the rigging. He entirely understood the need for rigour on these issues but still harboured hopes that the new ship would eventually secure at least a degree of renown. It would certainly be more comfortable. 

He looked paler than usual even for someone who generally exclusively inhabits the library and the seminar room and made some initial remarks suggesting a degree of envy towards ‘Greta’ who seemed to have had a much more straightforward time of it on her trip across the Atlantic. He put that down to the Swedish tendency towards Lutheranism and an easy life. 

By way of contrast, he had a ‘religious awakening’ whist at university and was reluctantly coming around to accepting the term that the tabloids had coined of being the ‘woke cleric’.

So, it is no surprise that Perkins lives up to his most well-known phrase: ‘Exegesis Is Good For You.’

He tends to speak in pamphlet form. The syntax is as dizzying as the subject matter but at least you have a good long time to become acclimatised. However, even careful listeners might find the combination of Elizabethan vernacular and a declamatory style that treats any room as if it were the size of a small cathedral a little much. Accordingly, we have edited for brevity and volume and (considerably) increased the size of the typography.

With a justified (oh goodness not that kind of justified) sense of trepidation, we began by asking him for a brief summary of strict Calvinism and why he felt it would go down so well in Brooklyn Heights. 

It rapidly became apparent that Perkins is definitely one for those who take a doppio or three with their theology. 

His latest notion was ‘double predestination’. This held that God had ordained everything that happened and had also elected some people to salvation whilst the remainder were reprobates who would be damned for all eternity for their sins. Some of them were basically being given the bum’s rush a touch unfairly given that they’d just inherited original sin but, hey, distinctions have to be maintained.  

For many it is a strange doctrine. None of those pesky works. Certainly, no indulgences. Being saved meant being chosen.

That’s why he’d felt the urge to cross the ocean. The denizens of Brooklyn were living up to this perfectly. They regarded much of the nation as reprobate and were engaged in exactly the kind of abstract musings that kept him occupied. 

We pressed him a little on where this all led and in particular how, when you don’t actually know if you have been chosen, you can be confident about being part of the in-crowd. 

Some brisk beard stroking resulted but we understood later than this was his way of maintaining equanimity. 

The point that we had failed to grasp was that whilst you could not know that you were amongst the elect; the elect would all behave in a manner that displayed their state of grace. So, if you acted in such a manner you were at least still in the game. Crucially, you were better than everyone else. Provided you performed that way, you had all the attributes that you needed.

One could see this play out in all sorts of ways. Clothes (he favoured a particular type of ruff that was only available in a small number of outlets and the suppliers were planning to open one soon after his tour had concluded), interior design (walls must always be white), church governance and consistent views on the position of the altar.

But wasn’t there always that lurking menace of those people who felt that if they were saved anyway then they could, frankly, do whatever they wanted? Hurriedly looking at our notes we mentioned some outrageous goings on in Munster but he cut us off in the manner of someone who would brook no more, muttering something about pesky anabaptists and 'that was a long time ago'.

Your correspondents had a sense that Perkins might indeed have tapped into a strong market. There was a performative equality at work here that made people feel that they belonged and that they were justified (no, not that kind of justification). 

So for now this is a small step but the sermon sessions have been selling out and whist Perkins expressed some doubts about visiting a vineyard he was reassured that Goody Martha was in charge. That would be a fitting session for his final appearance before leaving for the long journey back to England.

Your correspondents felt that the only point at which Perkins looked distinctly discomfited was when as something of a desperate sally we wondered what would happen if one assumed that there was perhaps something of god in everyone. 

It may have been a trick of the light, but we do think he Quaked.  









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